You're the only light I ever saw (and we dance in between takes)
by weareallgeniouses
Summary: Clarke is an intern on her third year at Med School. Lexa is a Special Agent whose team has been given its first mission. They meet while Lexa's breaking the rules, but something good has to come up, right? or It takes as long as it takes & that's ok.
1. Chapter 1

Clarke takes a few seconds to adjust to the craziness that the ER has turned into, but it doesn't take too long before she's looking at charts and talking to the paramedics. After the team had received the phone call letting them know they six injured people were on their way, Dr. Abby made sure everyone was prepared. Extra of everything, nurses ready, beds available.

"Interns, this is your moment. This is one of those moments when you get to actually do something and use your hands to save people. Let's never forget this", she tell them and her blue eyes are shining, very much like Clarke's. And she knows this and looks up at her mother. Sure, Clarke knows her mother's reputation has opened some doors for her, but it is her hard work that will make sure Clarke becomes a doctor, a healer, a surgeon one day.

Then the doors of the ER were pushed open.

Paramedics rushed in. Three of them male, three female. Three of them suspects. Three of them detectives. Three good guys and three bad guys? If only things were so black and white, Clarke reflected before joining in the action. Tucking a blonde hair strand, Clarke moves next to a paramedic who's just arrived to the ER.

"So what do we have here?", she asks and begins walking into the ER with them.

Half an hour goes by before Clarke has to use the the defibrillator. She knew it was meant to happen. A shooting. What is wrong with the world? She manages to save the patient but these are not the words she's looking for. She's not a savior (like so many of her arrogants med school fellows seem to think of themselves), she's there just to help out.

"Nice job, Dr. Griffin", Dr. Pike offers. He's a tall black man who's been just elected as Chief of Trauma. Her mother on the other hand has been in charge of the Surgery team for ten years now. "I will take the patient into ICU, nice going", he offers her a small smiles and she doesn't make out anything out of it. Instead, she goes back into the ER. It' not busy anymore, patients have been dispatched to other areas. It almost looks as if nothing had happened. Almost.

"Hey Clarke, want to give me a hand here?", it's Bellamy, a friend from school and fellow intern. He's nice most of the time. "You know how I feel about stitches", he motions holding needle and the thread.

"Oh, c'me on, Bell", she mouths. She can't see the patient who's sitting on the bed but she doesn't want to embarrass her friend. Bellamy is standing next to the bed, the patient sitting there and the curtain in the ER barely opened.

"Oh, she knows how much I hate needles", he explains.

"And I've been trying to have him page a different doctor or nurse for the past 10 minutes with no luck so far. I should be out of here by now", the patient replies.

"Well, I was cleaning this up, I am good at that. The rest of it? Not so much", he explains shrugging. "I'll be a good MD, that would be all".

Clarke walks up to them, she first sees long brown hair, a hint of a shoulder. The patient sights, Clarke can't blame her for being so desperate to get out of there.

"I am sorry, I am Dr. Griffin, I will take care of this Bell, you can leave"

"I owe you one, Clarke"

"Yeah, next time…", but he's gone before she can finish that sentence. Again, most of the time he's fine but now. Not so much.

"I apologize for this whole thing, most days he's a professional"

"Well, yeah. As long as the other doctors are more responsible. They have the lives of many people on their hands, they have my people's lives in their hands right now"

"Are you… a detective?", Clarke doesn't like to assume things. The patient is well dressed and has good manners, but that doesn't mean a thing.

"Special Agent Lexa Woods", she says shaking Clarke's with her good hand.

"And why exactly are you here and there's no chart?"

"I asked your friend to just take care of this. I've seen worse, I am sure you have as well and I just want to get out of here and go see my squad. I don't need much more, really. I know how to take care of myself, Dr. Griffin"

"Call me Clarke. And you should be taking this injuries more seriously. This is no game Lexa, this is your life we're talking about"

Lexa remains silent.

"Do you want to explain how did this even happened?"

"Life on the line…", Clarke's prepping up the needle. "I stayed behind knowing my team had a better view on the house we were about to break into"

First stitch. Lexa doesn't move.

"Truth is, it was just a silly accident. There was a fence and I got caught and almost tripped. Rookie mistake."

Second stitch. Lexa is stoic.

"So my arm got smashed against some shattered glass. Stupid. But the suspects were already trying to escape. I didn't have time to look back. I know I managed to shoot at one of them"

Third stitch.

"They tried to run away, but we of course stopped them. I called the ambulance. And now we're here and I would really like to know how my crew is doing"

"They're ok, Lexa. And I am sure you need to go up there and interrogate the suspects, and you'd love to be done here and you are, so there… I still don't feel ok with you not having a chart"

"I will pay…"

"No! Not because of that. I mean, that's not my concern, but someone should follow up on those stitches. And you need to take some pills". Clarke takes her receipts from her coat. "Here, take this every 4 hours and then this every 8. Just… here, take some", she hands her some free samples.

"Thank you Doctor"

"Don't mention it... Seriously, don't"

"Let me take you out for lunch? I mean, as thank you and then… maybe you could check my stitches"

"Really?"

"I'm sorry, you really don't have to…"

"It's fine Lexa. Here's my number", Clarke takes the receipt and scribbles down her number. "Text me, we'll figure out the details"

"Thanks. I, uhm…"

"Should go look for your team, yes"

"Yeah, my boss is looking for me. It was one of our first mission as a team, without senior supervision"

"It could have gone worse"

"Yeah, that's exactly what he texted before, he's just glad we got the suspects"

"Right"

Lexa stands up and takes her coat from a near by chair. She looks at Clarke and for the first time the doctor actually notices big green eyes looking at her. They're bright but hesitant. She looks tired but knowing the night will be long.

Clarke knows this to be true also for herself. Lexa motions goodbye.

"Thank you Doctor. I will see you soon", and walks away.

Clarke looks at her watch. Only 6 more hours to go.


	2. Chapter 2

Two days went by. Two days since Clarke had met Special Agent Lexa. Since she had given her her number, for medical purposes only, but still. It stung a bit the fact that the brunette hadn't called. But why would she?, the doctor reflected.

"Earth to Clarke", her friend teased her entering the break room. "Come on, blondie. What's up? Octavia kept you up again with a Super Mario Bros. challenge? I've told you you gotta put your priorities in order", she finishes sitting next to her friend.

"It's not that, R", Clarke responded. Raven was one of her best friends. They had met in NYU during their undergrad time, Clarke was a Biology major while Raven was a Chemistry major. They became good friends and began hanging out, then both were accepted at Columbia for Med School and that was all the courage Clarke needed to continue the struggle that school could be some times. Rave was outspoken and brave, qualities the blonde admired. Though Clarke's aim was to become a surgeon, Raven was more interested in the biochemical side of medicine, she wanted to fix the human body through new ways of organs transplants, that was the plan anyway.

"It's just that I met someone the other day and she…"

"Oh, dear God, that is amazing! Finally, finally, you like someone? And she hasn't called and you're here sulking. Who is she? Do you know where she works? Can we Facebook stalk her? How about we go to her office right now? So romantic"

"That sounds crazy, Raven! And I don't know much about her really… and it's a little bit mean that you find it so amazing that she hasn't called!"

"It's not that what I find amazing, what I find amazing it's the fact that you finally like someone! I feel like it's been forever. Since that a-hol Finn boy from sophomore year you haven't been interested in anyone. I feel like I should call Octavia, have you told her?"

"No, it's not a big deal. So what? I liked someone who didn't like me back. Big deal"

"It is a little bit and I got the exclusive, not O"

"It's not a competition!"

"Everything is competition Clarke Griffin, you and I know both that, we are med students so we know…", but Raven speech is interrupted by a vibrating phone.

UNKNOWN NUMBER

"It's her!", Raven yells. Clarke stands up and picks up the phone.

"Hello?", she tries to say casually.

"Hi, this is Lexa… Woods… Special Agent… well, I have three stitches"

"I remember, hi Lexa", Clarke smiles into the phone.

"Right, you put them there. Something like that. I was wondering if you'd like to have lunch today and take a look at them? Not all at the same time, like we can grab a bite and…"

"Lexa, that sounds good but I unfortunately can't make it for lunch, we have some Med School thing today. But I can make it for dinner if that still works for you"

"Yes, of course. Yes, it'd be great to have dinner. We could, I can pick you up from work or something?"

"Ah, that sounds good but I would like to go home and prepare for the date", Clarke gulps a little bit at this. She probably shouldn't have pushed, but she can't help it. "I don't live too far away from the hospital"

"Oh, good. So text me your address and I will pick you up, is 7:30 ok?"

"Yes, it's perfect"

"Alright, so 7:30 at your place. It's a date then. See you in a few hours Clarke"

"Bye Lexa"

Clarke hangs up.

Screams a little bit.

"So you have a date tonight", Raven comments with a smirk.

Hours fly by for Clarke that day. Even the lunch the school had planned for them didn't feel as bad. She was grateful Raven was there as well as Bellamy, who was behaving as a decent human being.

At 6 o'clock Clarke rushes through the mein door and hops on a taxi to get home faster, though she lives 20 minutes away, walking distance, from work. She showers really quickly and cheks her phone: 6:30. Her heart is beating faster than usual and harder. It's the good kind of nervous she thinks. She hasn't been out much lately, Raven is right.

Then she hears the door's apartment close.

"O! I'm so glad you're here"

"First of all Clarke Griffin, what on Earth is this thing about you having a date and sulking for two days because some girl hadn't call and why do I have to find out about this through Raven?", Octavia half asks, half screams.

"I am sorry, O! I just didn't want to think about her, though I WAS thinking about her all the time and why she hadn't called, but then she called today and we made dinner plans and now she'll be here in 20 minutes and I don't know what to wear", Clarke replies without stopping to breath.

"Wow, Clarke. You're gonna faint. Now, I am letting this go for the next few minutes but once you're back from your date and you tell me all the details about this seemingly amazing girl, you and I are gonna have a talk about BFF privileges. Understood?"

"Yes… now help?"

"Fine, do you know where you're going?"

Clarke shrugs, "not really… she's picking me up though"

"Not helpful… but, let's see", Octavia muses to Clarke's closet. "I've always liked this on you", she hands Clarke a white knee long dress. "Today's not too hot or cold, it's casual yet formal"

"You're completely right"

"Now lets do your hair, we have a few minutes"

At 7 o'clock sharp the ring buzzes.

"It's her", Clarke exclaims jumping from the bed.

"Ah, lucky I have a good hand, otherwise I would have poked your eye with this thing", Octavia smiles. "I'll go get the door, you put your jacked on"

"Who is this?", Octavia asks through the interphone, with a teasing tone of voice.

"Hi… uhm, this is Lexa. I am here to see Clarke, please", the brunette replies on the other end. Octavia smiles at the formality.

"She'll be down there in a second, Lexa. This is Octavia, by the way, Clarke's roommate", she is about to keep talking - probably give Lexa the best friend talk, but is interrupted by Clarke.

"Lexa, I'm on my way", Clarke says pushing Octavia. "Now, come on O. It's too soon to scare her away, I am more than capable of doing that on my own"

"Ah, princess, I doubt that. Now go and have fun"

Clarke rushes downstairs and tries to put herself together before opening the condo's door.

"Hi Clarke", Lexa tells her looking her in the eyes and Clarke's breath hitches. She wonders if its the unrequired work out she just did or maybe just looking at Lexa. "You look beautiful in that dress"

"Thank you Lexa, you look good yourself", she hugged the taller girl, who froze for a second before hugging Clarke back. It was only a second. Lightning lasts longer.

"So I was thinking we could go to this small italian restaurant, is nothing fancy but the food is delicious. Though I completely forgot to ask if you're a vegetarian or vegan or something, but they have may options. And they have a wine, it's a Malbec from a small italian house… do you like that? I mean, we could go elsewhere?"

"This place sounds great, how did you find out about it?", Clarke asks as Lexa guides the way. Octavia was right, it wasn't too cold or hot, it was a perfect day for a walk. Clarke took Lexa's arm, who was happy to have the girl on her side. Amazingly, it was Lexa's good arm.

"I used to live very close from here, when I was in the Academy, but eventually I moved with one of the guys from my crew to Brooklyn, actually"

"You hipster, you"

"Hey, it was cheaper back then. I am all against gentrification"

"Right. How are those stitches coming along?"

"Well, this is why I brought you here, isn't it?", she replies with a smirk.

"Oh, I completely forgot, I apologize detective"

"No need, doctor"

They walk for another few minutes, taking in the night. Clarke telling Lexa about living with Octavia, working with Raven and Bellamy, med school.

Soon they are outside of a small house, at least that what it looks like until Lexa opens the door for them. It's cozy just like Lexa had mentioned, dim lights, light red walls, candles spread around the main room, jazz music. There are barely 8 tables that Clarke can see.

"Lexa, good to see you again", says a woman greeting them, she has a light italian accent. "I've known this girl for… almost 6 years now. Did she tell you she used to waitress here?", Clarke barely has time to shake her head, as the woman is leading them to a smaller room.

"Ah, she did. When she was just in the police academy. Such a good girl", she smiles at Lexa and then goes back to Clarke, "So I expect you're nice to her…"

"Clarke, I'm Clarke", the blonde replies not really surprised by the woman's protective manner. She doesn't feel threatened, it's endearing actually, Clarke thinks.

"Alright Clarke. I will leave you two, Lexa can explain our specialties and of course, about our special wine. Please, sit", she asks them motioning the only table in the room before leaving.

"I am sorry", Lexa begins, blushing and pulling the chair so Clarke can sit. "She's a handful but means well. We've known each other for a long time and when I mentioned I was inviting someone over, she…"

"Hey, it's fine. I recall correctly, I have been doing my best to keep you safe. And, before there's wine and food, I'd like to see those stitches. I am pretty sure they're not ready to come off, but I'd like to just take a look and see how they are."

"Right", Lexa moves next to Clarke and takes off her shirt. She's wearing a sleeveless top and black pants. It may not be anything out of the extraordinary but Clarke can see how fit Lexa is, her toned arms are distracting, but she soon puts herself together and examines Lexa's arm.

"You've been taking the pills, right? They help"

"Of course, well, not today because… the wine"

"Right", Clarke smiles. "You're doing well… so I suppose it's fine. You should take them tomorrow anyway and I think that'll be it"

"Whatever you say, doctor"

Soon they place their orders while they chat about their backgrounds. Clarke grew up in Newark, but spent time in Manhattan because of her parent's jobs, her mother was Chief of Surgery at Clarke's hospital and her father was an architect, a visionary Clarke would say. Lexa's story was different. She grew up in Williamsburg "again, before it was even cool", she made a point to mention, but lost her mother when she was very young. Cancer. Then her father passed away when she was 21. Car accident.

"I am so, so sorry Lexa"

"It's fine. He was also a cop, you know? He was very happy that I was on my way of becoming one"

"I am sure he's very proud"

"I know… anyway, that's when I moved to this area and met Giorgi and her family. I had known them for almost only a year when I graduated from the Academy, but they were there, cheering for me. I don't get to see them often, but I try to visit every now and then."

"Who were you living with?"

"Uhm, my ex girlfriend", she replies blushing. Though they had called this a date, there are many meanings and uses to that words. And of course, ex girlfriends are always a good way to open up conversation on sexualities and identities. "So, we lived together for about 3 years… yeah. We don't anymore, I mean, we broke up about 3 years ago and I've been living in Brooklyn since"

"I would ask more about that relationship, but I have a "no exes" rule on the first date. I mean I don't date much"

"That's a good policy for first dates"

Clarke smiles. "Just so you know, I identify as bi"

"Oh, that's good to know… I don't make assumptions, like I think people can do their thing and… I do identify as gay, but like..."

"Thanks", Clarke replies, liking how Lexa just didn't need to know more.

"So, Lexa, what is your favorite movie?"

The spend the rest of the dinner laughing, Lexa likes to make impressions but sucks at them.

"You know? When I met you, you looked like you were ready for war. Like, if anything would happen you'd be ready to hand out your gun. And I am not saying you wouldn't do that right now if something happened, but you're… such a dork, but adorable. Like a dork but in a nice way"

"I don't see how that could be nice"

"It is, trust me"

"Good then", Lexa smiles and asks for the check. "It's getting late and we both know this is not the safest area to walk at night"

"I know"

Giorgia walks back and puts a plate with a piece of cake on the couple's table. "No check, enjoy this pay though, I made it myself"

"Wow, thank you so much", Clarke smile grows. "I love pay"

"Good, eat then"

"Giorgia, this is too much", Lexa tries.

"Nonsense. Enjoy desert", she says leaving them alone again.

"Clarke?"

"Yes?", Clarke considers for a second if its bad first date manners that she's already eating the pay, (but it's so good!), she considers to stop eating the pay but doesn't. Instead she just looks up, spoon still trying to get a good bite of the pay.

"Would you like to go out again? I was thinking Sunday might be a good day, if you're not too busy and all…"

Clarke takes her spoon from her plate, her mouth still full. She tries to feed Lexa, who raises her brows.

"Oh, this is for me? You're sharing now?"

Clarke tries not to laugh and manages to say, "this is my way of saying yes"

Lexa smiles. "OK" and takes the bite.

They walk back to Clarke's place in silence. Their hands barely touching. Then Clarke makes the move, since Lexa had asked her on a second date. She takes Lexa's hand on her own. She feels how the other woman stiffens at first and then casually relaxes into Clarke's hands.

"You have nice hands", Lexa mentions blushing.

"Thanks, they're surgeon hands, you know?", Clarke says playfully.

"Oh, and here I was thinking you were one of the nice doctors that didn't like to show off"

"Yeah, well… what can I say? Someone has to believe in these hands"

"I do, I believe in your capacity as a doctor and future surgeon"

Clarke stops for a second and looks at Lexa. "Thanks", she keeps walking squeezing Lexa's hand a bit.

Soon they are in front of Clarke's door.

"Is there a no kissing rule at the end of first dates as well?"

"No", replies Clarke pretending to think about that, "not that I can think of"

"Good"

And with that Lexa takes a step closer to Clarke and begins to close the gap between their lips before Clarke moves to meet Lexa's lips a bit too fast and eager for her own liking, but she can't help it. I had been such a good date, she needed to know if Lexa's lips felt as good as she thought. And they did. Clarke would keep on kissing Lexa, but knew had to stop at some point. Unless… no, no sleeping with anyone (worthy) on the first date.

When they finally break apart, Lexa kisses Clarke on the cheek.

"So, I will see you on Sunday, I can meet you here again if you'd like?"

""Sure", Clarke replies, "can't wait for Sunday. Text me when you get home, yes?", the blonde asks moving to her door and pulling out her keys.

"Will do. Have a good night Clarke", Lexa smiles.

"You too", and with that Clarke walks into her and runs up the stairs.

Clarke practically smashes the apartment's door and jumps next to Octavia who's watching TV in the living room.

"I take it, it went well?"

"It was amazing. She's amazing. We went to this little italian place that she knows and this little italian lady owns it, she's scary but so nice and then we had an amazing pasta that's supposed to be her specialty and oh, should I text her now? I asked her to text me once she was home, but I really want to tell her I had a good time, and yeah, we had this pay for desert, you know? She saw how I eat pay, O! And she still kissed me at the end of the night!", Clarke screams leaning then into her best friend.

"I am so happy for you! Like, I didn't understand half of what you said, but from the quantity of pheromones exhaling from you right now, I can tell it went freaking well. And she survived you eating pay, she's a hero"

"Ahh, should I text her now?"

"Dude you just saw her like 5 minutes ago. Let her get home, she will text you and then you can tell her what an amazing night you had. Now come here, watch the movie with me and then, once you have calmed down, can tell me all about tonight"

"Can we put Raven on speaker?"

"Are you sure you're about to become a doctor?", she replies playfully. "Of course we can"

Half an hour later Clarke's phone beeps.

"Thank you for tonight. I am home now. See you on Sunday"

Clarke smiles.

"Thank YOU for tonight, can't wait for Sunday. Text me tomorrow? :)"

"Of course. :)"


	3. Chapter 3

"Hey", Lexa starts. "I'm gonna be a bit late, babe"

"Everything ok?", Clarke asks on the other end of the phone.

"Yeah, you know, we caught one of the bad guys, now we still have some paperwork to deal with"

"Ah, I see"

"I am sorry"

"No, I understand", Clarke replies while putting away her scrubs in the dirty pile at the hospital. The break room suddenly feels small. She's getting frustrated. "Call me when you're done?"

"Absolutely. Bye"

Clarke hangs up.

"How are things with Lexa?", Raven asks.

"Yeah, I mean, when we're together everything's great, you know? But it's the things that happen when we're apart that bother me. I completely understand that she's a Special Agent and she can't tell me everything that happens at work, but then we've been dating for a month and the other day she came home bruised again and of course she didn't want to go to the hospital, that rib could've been broken, but did she go see an actual doctor? No, of course not… and then, she disappears for hours and when she appears again it's only to say she'll be late. I don't wanna be that girlfriend, but I honestly don't know what she wants from me"

"Maybe she doesn't know either. Maybe you need to ask her"

"It started out as something so simple"

"Good things never come easy, you know that. Ask her, I mean, how many relationships has she been in?"

"One, a few years ago"

"Maybe she's scared"

"I'm going home"

"Talk to O, maybe she'll have better ideas"

"No, I understand what you're saying Rae, thanks"

"Anytime, blondie"

* * *

Clarke walks into her apartment half defeated, half tired of work. Octavia is in the couch watching Netflix.

"Clarke? I thought you were going to be with Lexa"

"So did I", she replies plopping in the couch next to Octavia. The brunette moves closer and holds Clarke.

"What happened? She seems nice, I mean, I've only seen her once but she looked like a good person, very fond of you, very much looking at you like you were the only one in the room which is always good to see when your roommate's dating someone"

"She's late. Which I understand. But…", Clarke's explanation is interrupted by a message. "It's Lexa, she's downstairs"

"Well, go see her. You know you wanna, give her a chance"

Clarke pretends not to be excited to see Lexa. She really likes the girl, but there's only so much mystery she can take.

"Hey, I'll be downstairs in a minute", Clarke tells Lexa.

"I will go hide in my room and put on a movie or something and it'll be as if I'm not even here", Octavia manages to announce before Clarke's rushing downstairs.

The doctor opens the door and sees Lexa standing outside coily and nervous, she has a bouquet of flowers on her hands.

"Good to see you, agent"

"Good night, doctor… I, I brought this for you", Lexa starts by handing the blonde the flowers. "I understand it's not much and that you're upset"

"That's a good start"

"I know I haven't been, well, it's not easy for me to date really. Could we maybe do this elsewhere?"

"Do you want to come upstairs? Octavia is hiding in her room"

"Yeah"

They move to Clarke's apartment in silence.

"You were saying", Clarke begins as she sits in one of the couches in the living room. Lexa sits next to her.

"Yes, I was saying… I am really sorry I've been acting so weird. I know it's been partly because of work, but I also know it's me. I suck at feelings"

"Try", the blonde tells the brunette.

"Well, I haven't been in an actual relationship in a while. I get bored or think that, you know, I kinda like the single life. You get to do what you want whenever, nobody's asking anything from you. I really don't respond well to people wanting things from me, except at work. I am really good at my job"

She pauses and looks at Clarke, who's still just staring at Lexa.

"But then I met you", Lexa blushes and rushes through these words.

Clarke's still waiting how this will play out, but so far she's not completely sure this is looking good for her. The flowers though.

"And then I couldn't help wanting to call you and seeing you again. I am kind of a mess, I work a lot and don't eat well, I exercise like crazy and have problems being social, but I want to try and give a shot at being a better person, you know, a person that you would date. It's just that I am so used now to being on my own, to do my thing. But I want to try Clarke at being there for you and being here, present, for you. And doing things and making plans"

"So… what do we do now?", the doctor asks uncertain.

"It'd like to know what do you think about this, I mean, I think I just basically said I am into you"

"Yeah", it is time for Clarke to blush now. "I wasn't expecting you to be so honest, after all the hiding"

"I am sorry about that"

"I know now, and thank you for explaining all of this to me. I guess I do things differently, I like being open to things and just taking the leap, you know? And I understand that you're trying and thank you so much for telling me because I know we both have lots of responsibilities on our hands. You have a new unit to lead and I have a job at a hospital, but I think we can make this work, because I really like you too."

"So now I get a kiss?", Lexa asks shyly.

"Yes... you do"


End file.
